The Gossip

The media has been buzzing about the issue of “bullying” for the past several weeks as national attention has been brought to students who, in a sense, have been bullied to death.. All too often I think people do not step back and think about the consequences that words can have on our fellow man. It is bad enough that name calling, derogatory comments, sly remarks, and cruel taunts are part of our schools, but the truth of the matter is that even as adults people are sometimes immature idiots when it comes to using these tactics to make someone’s life a living hell.

When I was growing up I heard my fair share of cruel things being said and can certainly say without a doubt I was bullied in school. I still can recall everything that was said about me back then, nothing was off limits. My teeth were not straight enough, my hair was too frizzy, I was too skinny, did not have the right clothes, I am sure I can keep going, but I am sure you get the idea. I hated school and used to wish that the neat little black holes that existed in cartoons could be real so you could just fling one down on the ground and disappear. What I am trying to say, is yeah I do understand why bullied kids sometimes kill themselves.

The sad thing is those days I was convinced that once I was an adult I would never have to endure such cruelty again. WRONG. It actually turns out that adults are sometimes not much better. Instead of blatant taunts and locker bumps, you have people who like to start rumors and make up stories in order to hurt their fellow man (or woman).

Recently I went to a training and was fortunate enough to be able to go with my wonderful family. It was held in a gorgeous state park and I though being fall it would be a great semi vacation. Only what I did not remember is that the group that was there has a few of these ladies that due to lack of excitement in their own lives, must attempt to talk about other people’s life’s. We all know the personality type, the one that seems to be interested in everyone else’s business only so that they can attempt to talk about them later. They love to start sentences with “now you didn’t hear this from me” or the “what I heard is”. Worse yet some of this gossipers spat out stuff that they completely fabricate cause it makes a rather good story. Which brings me to my lovely training, there is one particular lady (who for the sake of not ever sinking to her level I will not mention her name) manages to spread some kind of venom filled lies about me nearly every time I come across her sight. Now, I can speculate as to why she does this but I am honestly not sure but my favorite thought is perhaps she does it because on some level she is jealous that I have a good happy life, at least I like to think that is why. Anyways, at a particular moment in the training I saw the schedule was getting ready to be a bit off of anything I needed to hear about, so instead I slipped out the door and went to join my family for a rather long beautiful lunch. Now that seems rather innocent enough ahhhhh but the opportunity for the gossip was too much. Her brain went into overdrive and her mouth even faster. It would later be related through the training room that I was there to “hook up”. HOOK UP? hmmmm I am 39 years old and there with my family so yes in one sense I was there to hook up. Of course the hook up’ ees are darn adorable so I can see how that could be a point of contingency for the story. At first I was rather upset after hearing that somehow despite being there with my family I was being painted as, well as my grandmother would of said it, a hussy. I was hurt and angry as I dragged myself back to my room later to meet up with the family and relay the information to my husband. He of course brought the smile back out as he attempted to assure me that gossips are normally jealous and trying to bring you to their level. Might not be true but heck I like to think maybe that was the case.

The crazy point to all of this is that even as an adult people still try to attack one another and bully them. Why is it that society still allows this kind of behavior. How many people need to leap from a bridge, or tie a noose around their neck in despair before we take responsibility for our role in this. No I am not talking about tolerance, I am talking about just being plain mean to one another. Do we need to point out that someone is large, or skinny, or that their teeth are crocked, or yellow? I am quite certain if there is a flaw they already are self conscious about it. I often wonder what kind of world we would live in if we were all blind ... besides the numerous car accidents.